This is one my dad used to say to us and my mother would say “OH Don!!!!”:
There was a little puppy dog, a puppy dog was he,
he picked up his little leg and piddled up a tree.
Because the tree was smoking, he thought it was on fire,
so he picked up his little leg and piddled a little higher.
Apple C 
Hi, my mum told me this from the time i was very small:
Listen, listen, the cat is pissin,
Where, where, under the chair,
Run, run, get the gun,
Its okay, she’s all done.
Our parents seem to have the same sense of humour!
Honestly its like this.